Staying Clean and Sober in The Everyday World

 We will continue with our list concerning our sexual forays.  If you missed Sunday’s post then you would need to go back and start there.  Here is the rest of the list for the other 3 columns.

Column 3 (Did we unjustifyably arouse jealousy, suspision or bitterness)

1. Jealousy:

• Of her, him, family, friends, co-workers, etc.
• How did I cause jealousy (tricking, flirting, also see Suspicion below)?

     2.  Suspicion:

• Of her, him, family, friends, co-workers, etc.
• How did I cause suspicion (lying, tricking, flirting, coming home late etc.)?

     3.  Bitterness:

• About her, him, family, friends, co-workers, etc.
• About me (guilt, shame)
• How did I cause bitterness?

Column 4 (Where was I at fault?)

• Was I selfish, self-seeking, dishonest, or fearful, thoughtless, uncaring?

Column 5 (What should I have done instead?)

• Not used the person
• Respected him/her
• Tried to be a friend
• Been candid and open
• Cared about him/her
• Treated him/her as I would have wanted to be treated

This exercise is not done over night.  You will need to go back through your past and look at ALL of your sexual partners (or at least as many as you can remember).  This is not easy but I promise the results are rewarding.  As a result of completing this exercise you will know your mistakes and be able to avoid many of them in the future which will lead you to a healthy and satisfying relationship.  I encourage you to take the time and energy required to complete this.