Staying Clean and Sober in The Everyday World

Denial is a defense mechanism postulated by Sigmund Freud, in which a person is faced with a fact that is too uncomfortable to accept and rejects it instead, insisting that it is not true despite what may be overwhelming evidence.

Yep that pretty much sums it up.  That is exactly what we do as addicts.  Our family and friends try to reason with us.  They tell us how bad off we really are.  We know it is true what they are saying.  We just do not want to admit the bitter truth so we deny what is really going on not only to them but to ourselves as well.  We become so good at denial that it takes something very drastic to get us to see the light.

We justify, we deny, we ignore, we blame, we lie.  These are our defenses.  These are the tools that we have to work with to keep us going.  After all if we do not do these things then we must look at things the way they really are.  That is just too painful.  We would have to admit we are wrong.  We would have to be willing to change the way we are.  For many addicts this proposition alone keeps them using.  For them it easier to stay the same than to try something different.  Their thoughts go something like this: “I will just fail, I always do.”  “Worse yet what if I succeed?”  “Nothing will be the same and I won’t know how to act.”

I will quit tomorrow.  I have went to bed many times thinking this but when the morning came the first thing on my mind was to find a hit.  Then one day I hit bottom and the only way out was up.  Keep praying for your loved one because prayer can and will change things.  No one or nothing is immune to the power of prayer.  Remember one important thing.  If you keep doing what you have been doing then you will keep getting what you have been getting.  The definition of insanity is:  keep doing the same thing expecting different results.  These sayings are not just for the addict but for everyone involved.

Keep pushing and they will keep pushing back with their denial.  If you stop pushing and step away they will fall down.  that is when they can truly get up.  It is called “tough love”.

Trackback URI | Comments RSS